This week has been a tough one. I’ve been so busy with work, tonight is the first night I’ve been able to sit down and relax. All week I’ve been working 8:30am till 11:30pm. I’ve already broken my first goal to improve my work life balance in the second week of the year. That being send I am hoping this is a temporary thing. I am preparing for a big workshop of which I seem to be taking the reins of which will see lots of people from team member to director level attend and its up to me to make it a success to ensure their buy in. This is something I do not want to get wrong! So much so its seen me working these crazy hours and I feel like I’ve neglected being a parent.
Friday morning I felt really bad about having to work for the whole day. It had snowed overnight and when Riley saw the blanket of white outside he was very excited. It’s been the first time we have had proper snow that he would have been able to play out in. I saw a post from the nursery on facebook mentioning that they wouldn’t be able to go out in the snow because of the wind so there went the mum guilt big time! Not only could I not take him out, but neither could the nursery. I snapped a picture of him in the dark outside the nursery in the snow but spent most of the day being super jealous of all my friends posts on facebook who were outside in the daylight playing with their little ones in the snow.
Thankfully today I’ve been able to spend more time with Riley than just half an hour in the morning and an hour at night. We decided to head out to town; Kev needed something to wear for his night out (I swear he is worse than me and needs a new outfit every time he goes out!) and we were going to try and get some lunch. We made it into the first shop after our icy walk into town and Riley started kicking off. He started playing up by running away from me behind the clothes racks. He has an awful habit just now of running away and hiding which just leaves me in a panic that I’ve lost my child! Well I wasn’t putting up with it today and grabbed his arm and marched him out of the shop. Clearly not one of the best ideas as the realisation he was being removed from the endless rows of hiding places resulted in a tantrum which escalated quickly as he started trying to hit me. I don’t think I’ve ever been so embarrassed before by him out in public. We had to forgo Kev’s clothes shopping and tried to make it out of the shopping centre whilst trying to calm him down.
There went our day of spending family time together. I was so mad! When we got home he was sent to his room to calm down. He came back through to see us when he calmed down and said sorry in that cute little voice that only kids can give you when they are trying to make it up to you. He came in for a cuddle and it was almost as if nothing ever happened!
It’s funny how kids can do that to you – send you to the brink of madness and flash a cheeky smile at you and cuddle into you to make you forget it all.